first week home and chemo #5

This was my first full week home with Elliot. All went well! One of the first mornings I stayed home, he looked at me and said in his pitifully sweet voice, "Mommy, I don't want you to go!" It warmed my heart to be able to say, "Honey, mommy's not going anywhere. I get to stay home with you every day." His eyes were brighter than I had seen them in a long time. Needless to say, I've been feeling grateful.

Overall, Elliot has had a good week. Despite his additional dose of chemo last week, he has been in pretty good spirits. He obviously gets more tired, and is much more moody, but compared to how we adults would deal with it, he's truly a superstar! His moods are becoming much more difficult to deal with, as it can be very challenging to know if he's misbehaving based on not feeling well or if he's simply being a 2-year-old little boy. Dan and I both struggle with this. The last thing we want in the end of all of this is a spoiled, whiny little boy, but quite frankly, that could happen. Nonetheless, we remind ourselves that we're doing the best we can and that we completely expect to do some "re-training" for both our kids when this is all said and done! :)

Friday went well. Julia joined us for the day and was able to observe everything that her little brother experiences each Friday. She was nothing less than encouraging and sweet. She even "took one for the team" and got her flu shot. Of course she had to name her "owie" just like Elliot named his "tubey". For the record, her little "friend's" name is Eely. :) I think it was comforting for Elliot to have his sister there with him, and hopefully it helped Julia comprehend, to the extent that a 4-year-old can, what this "cancer thing" is all about. She has displayed some signs of confusion recently in regards to her brother being "sick". To her, he's pretty normal. They still draw together, do puzzles together, chase each other and fight with each other, so this "sick" thing is a bit confusing. She knows he can't go to "school" because he's "sick", but her poor little mind can't quite grasp the reasoning behind it all. The strange thing is that in the end, she will most likely recollect this stage of life and Elliot will not. We're hoping that over the next few months, we can help her understand better. Friday was a good step towards that goal. 

Elliot's blood work turned out great again on Friday! We hope and pray for that every week. He was able to receive chemo as usual and there weren't any unexpected instances throughout the day.  The nurses and doctors all seemed to be surprised that he has not yet lost his hair. Not only has he not LOST his hair, his hair is long, thick and "rockstarish-looking" if you ask me. I'm completely opposed to cutting it unless absolutely necessary due to his utter dislike for the hair-cutting process. Therefore, we could really have some amazing hair by the end of this journey if he doesn't end up losing it! :)

Week after week, the doctors have asked us about Elliot's legs. In the beginning, they told us to keep an eye on his walking and possible stumbling from time to time. We never thought too much of it due to the fact that it was always mentioned in passing. Well, once again they asked this week, and we said that he continues to walk, and even run, quite normal. I asked the doctor what the chances of having issues with his legs are throughout the chemo. She explained that it is quite common and that they're a bit surprised that he hasn't struggled with it at this point. She explained this his chemo impacts the nervous system, which results in things like constipation and leg functioning. If he does experience problems walking, we will need to add a physical therapy appointment to our already vast array of doctors appointments on Fridays. Many kids his age end up using walking boots to assist them while they are on chemo. So far, there aren't any signs of this for Elliot, and our prayer is that he will continue to beat the odds. One of his favorite past-times is playing "chase", and it would break my heart if we weren't able to do this together anymore. Please keep this in your prayers!

Our appointments for next week are scheduled on Thursday rather than Friday due to scheduling conflicts with the urologist. We are scheduled to have a CT scan at 10am on Thursday to check on the progress of the tumor. According to physical examination, the tumor is shrinking quite rapidly, and our hope is that they find nothing different on the CT scan. Please pray for peace for Elliot and ourselves as we go through this process once again. No matter how many times you experience procedures such as this, it's never easy...especially for a 2-year-old who has no idea why he has to go through it!

Once again, our hearts are full this week! The number of people who have gone out of their way to make our lives easier...sent cards, sent gifts, brought meals, offered assistance, given hugs, sent emails and messages, and so much more...please know that YOU ARE TRULY APPRECIATED! Our community of friends and family continues to amaze us and bless our lives! THANK YOU!

Peace and love to you all as you experience your own challenges throughout this week. We know we're not alone and want you all to know that our hearts are with you, just as yours are with us!