First of all, I apologize that I haven't updated you all sooner, especially for those who are not on facebook to receive the brief updates there. Until now, it seemed to be too big of a task to tackle. My mind has been nowhere but with Elliot, and my heart has been very heavy the past few days as I watched my little boy struggle for comfort and peace. It has been an extremely rough few days since surgery, but I THINK we turned the corner towards recovery last night!!!!
Let me back up for those of you who haven't heard any updates since the last blog:
Most importantly, the surgery went GREAT! The tumor was completely sealed, thanks to the chemo treatments, and was easily removed without any spillage in the process along with the kidney as well. According to the naked eye, the surgeon didn't see any signs of active cancer in the surrounding tissue, the lymph nodes or any other organs. The right kidney appeared to be functioning perfectly, his heart looked great, and the adrenal gland was easily removed right along with the tumor and kidney. The post-surgery report was as good as it could possibly get! We clearly were extremely relieved and full of joy!
The surgeon informed us that the pathology report would take about 48 hours, so until then, we wouldn't know any specifics in regards to the histology being favorable or unfavorable, nor would we know if there were any microscopic cancer cells in the surrounding tissue or lymph nodes. Nonetheless, we still knew that regardless of the outcome, we would have treatment options that would likely be successful.
After meeting with the surgeon, we headed to the recovery room to see our sweet boy's face. Upon arrival, he heard our voices and quietly whispered in a fearful voice, "Mom?". My heart melted, my eyes filled with tears, and I put my cheek next to his. Poor boy was completely out of it...couldn't see our faces, rarely opened his eyes, and was obviously confused and scared. I hope I never witness such a sight again in my life.
Shortly after, we made our way up to our room, hand-in-hand with our sweet little man. Needless to say, he slept most of the day and night. He didn't fully wake up to the world around him until mid-day on Wednesday (the day after surgery). Once he woke up, the challenges began...nausea, vomiting, constipation, inability to urinate, abdominal pain, and so much more. I am aware that this is all in the realm of "normal" for such an invasive surgery, but after three days of what seemed to be minimal progress, we were emotionally and physically exhausted. I had "kept it together" until day three of cleaning up puke, changing sheets, sleepless nights for all, painful moans, etc. ect. ect. Finally on Friday, I struggled to hold back my tears (not in front of Elliot though). I started feeling like this was never going to change, no matter how many different medicines they tried or how many various "tricks" they pulled out of their hats to aid in each step of recovery. One step forward always seemed to lead to another step backwards. Everyone kept saying, "He's gonna turn the corner soon", but it didn't seem to be happening UNTIL last night (Friday).
After numerous times of forcing Elliot to get out of bed, take a few steps, ride in a wagon, ect., Elliot looked at me, pointed to the hallway and said, "I wanna go out there." Shocked, I immediately unplugged his IV pole, wrapped him up, got him in my arms, and pushed the pole into the hallway (Dan was out running errands, and I was afraid the opportunity would pass if I waited for his help). Just as I stepped into the hallway, I saw Dan walking towards our room. He quickly put his things in the room and helped me get Elliot into the wagon. To make a long story short, within an hour, Elliot was walking independently, was excited to play with toys, was talking in complete sentences, and was working on a bowel movement. YAY!!!!!! We were SHOCKED! Everyone was right...he was ready to turn a corner, but in true Elliot style, he did it in his own, abrupt fashion.
From the moment I spotted Elliot in the recovery room, I started anxiously anticipating the warmth of his amazing smile. Well, last night I knelt down next to him in the playroom, and said, "Elliot, can mommy see your big smile." He immediately gave me one of his cheesy smiles and continued playing. In that moment, I knew we were headed in the right direction and that everything was going to be okay.
To add to our joy, we also met with the oncologist yesterday and received news of a fantastic pathology report. The cancer has a favorable histology and there were no signs of any microscopic cancer cells anywhere. Praise God!
Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, WITH THANKSGIVING, present your requests to God.
We are definitely in the "thanksgiving" stage. I will forever be grateful for my babies, regardless of the journey we need to take with them. I know in my heart God never wanted this for my baby boy, and I also know that His strength has carried us every step of the way. For that, I will be eternally grateful.
As for today, we are laying low, waiting for more bowel movements :) and enjoying our time together. If all goes well today, we will likely go home tomorrow and be reunited with our sweet Julia.
Again, thank you for your overwhelming support! We have felt loved each and every day because of all of you. We realize that we still have a long journey of recovery, radiation and chemo ahead of us, but we choose to rejoice in our blessings today and let tomorrow worry about itself.
We love you all!!!
Pics...in order of time:
Always wants to hold our hand
Cozy sleeping :)
Taking off bandage
Friday: finally walking and playing